Why It’s OK to Find Pregnancy Hard

If pregnancy was only about that mythical “glow” and cute baby bump photos, it would be a dream. But let’s be real—it’s also about 3 a.m. trips to the loo, cravings that make no sense, and waking up to find that nothing fits. If you’re hating pregnancy, you’re not alone, and you’re definitely not wrong for feeling this way. It’s okay to feel less like a glowing goddess and more like a bloated, hormonal lump. Here’s why it’s totally fine to loathe this part of the journey.

1. Pregnancy Can Be Physically and Emotionally Draining

Growing a tiny human sounds adorable, but in reality, it’s exhausting. Morning sickness? It’s more like “all-day nausea.” Fatigue hits at random, and let’s not even start on the heartburn that feels like a dragon just moved into your esophagus. These symptoms aren’t “cute,” and you’re probably not exactly feeling like your best self. Some days, you might feel like all you’re growing is resentment, and that’s okay.

The emotional side is a whole other rollercoaster, too. One minute, you’re in tears over a TV advert; the next, you’re laughing at how ridiculous you feel. You’re supposed to be nurturing a life, but sometimes it feels like your body’s just nurturing chaos. You’re not “bad at pregnancy” because of these feelings—you’re just going through one of life’s messier, more dramatic phases.

2. Not Loving Pregnancy Doesn’t Mean You Won’t Love Your Baby

Contrary to what Instagram mums might have you believe, hating pregnancy does not mean you’ll hate your baby. It just means you hate swollen feet and having to roll out of bed like a turtle that’s flipped onto its shell. Babies are sweet, but the process of making one? Not so much.

Let’s put it this way: you don’t have to love cleaning to enjoy a clean house. You can totally love your future child while also resenting that your ankles have disappeared and you can no longer see your own toes.

3. The “Glow” Isn’t Always Real

Oh, the pregnancy glow! How wonderful it would be if it came packaged like a highlighter from Sephora. But sometimes, the “glow” people talk about is just the sheen of sweat from your 10th bathroom run of the night or from dealing with pregnancy acne that would make your teenage self blush.

Also, society loves to paint this picture of the “radiant, blooming” mother, but the reality often looks more like a mix of puffy cheeks, bloating, and some creative wardrobe choices to keep up with your body’s ever-changing size. That’s not a glow; that’s survival, and it’s just as valid.

4. Pregnancy Involves a Loss of Control

Remember the good old days when you could make choices about what you ate, wore, and drank? Now, even your favorite coffee is suspect, and sushi is off the table. When you do indulge, you might have random cravings for food combos that would horrify a chef (pickles and peanut butter, anyone?). And as your body changes, you might find yourself missing simple things, like sitting comfortably or bending over.

If you’re feeling cranky about all these changes, congratulations, you’re normal. Your autonomy has taken a nine-month holiday, and feeling resentful doesn’t make you a bad parent-to-be. It just means you miss wine and jeans that fit.

5. Societal Pressure Can Make Pregnancy Harder

From the moment you announce you’re pregnant, everyone (from strangers to your Great Aunty Joan) suddenly has opinions on what you should eat, wear, and think. If you’re not doing daily prenatal yoga and meditating with essential oils, society makes it seem like you’re basically slacking. And if you’re finding it hard to “glow” and “bloom” through the experience, it can feel like you’re failing some invisible test.

But here’s a secret: there is no perfect way to do pregnancy. It’s already hard enough without feeling like you have to win gold in the Olympics of motherhood before the baby’s even here. Feel free to roll your eyes at unsolicited advice—honestly, you’ve earned it.

6. It’s Okay to Acknowledge the Challenges of Pregnancy

The truth is, there’s no rule saying you have to enjoy every second of pregnancy. It’s possible to feel deeply grateful for the life you’re creating while also counting down the days until you can reclaim your body (and that overdue glass of wine).

There’s power in embracing these feelings. Talking about the struggles not only helps you process them, but it also reminds others that pregnancy isn’t all rainbows and prenatal vitamins. It’s okay to have days where you feel more like an overworked incubator than a glowing mother-to-be.

7. You Deserve Support, No Matter How You Feel About Pregnancy

Whether you’re loving or loathing this pregnancy, you deserve support and understanding. Talk to friends or loved ones, and don’t shy away from humour — it’s okay to laugh about how ridiculous it all feels. And don’t forget that your partner is there to help you—whether that means bringing you yet another pickle or just listening to you vent.

Pregnancy isn’t a fairy tale, and that’s perfectly okay. You’re allowed to have mixed feelings, to roll your eyes at the glow hype, and to eagerly await the day you can toss your maternity jeans. You’re growing a human, after all—surviving that journey is reason enough to feel proud. So, take it one day (and snack) at a time, and remember that you’re already doing an amazing job.