The Motherhood Taboo: Things We’re Afraid to Talk About

Ah, motherhood. The miracle of life, the joy of creation, the constant sound of “Mum, where’s my…?” ringing in your ears. But, let’s be real for a second: it’s not always sunshine and rainbows. Sometimes, it’s more like thunderstorms and thunderstorms—and by that, I mean real, raw, messy moments no one tells you about. But since we’re here, let’s dive into the taboo topics we all secretly struggle with, but are too afraid to admit.

1. Not Liking Your Children All the Time

Yes, you read that right. As much as you love them, you don’t always like them. They’re screaming at you, making a mess that defies the laws of physics and somehow still need snacks every five minutes. And guess what? That’s totally fine. It’s a valid feeling. But society would have you believe that motherhood is all about “unconditional love” and “endless patience.” Sorry, but my patience ran out sometime between the 3 a.m. wake-up call and the 17th request for “just one more story.” Do I love them? Absolutely. But like them in that moment? Hmmm, let’s circle back to that after the tantrum ends.

2. Incontinence: Because Who Doesn’t Love Peeing Their Pants?

Ah, the joys of childbirth. The real gift? Postpartum incontinence. Because, let’s face it, nothing says “I’m a mum” quite like sneezing and peeing your pants in front of the school gate. Or laughing so hard at a joke that, yeah, that little “accident” happens. Who knew that after nine months of growing a human, you’d be left with a bladder that can’t even handle a cough without thinking it’s time to spill its contents? So, no, you’re not alone. We’re all just here in our pee-soaked pants, trying to make it through the day.

3.Losing Your Temper (Because, Apparently, We’re All Supposed to Be Saints)

Let’s talk about rage. You know, that lovely moment when your child pushes every button you’ve ever had and you finally snap, yelling something like “How many times do I have to say it?!?” Sure, after the moment passes, you feel awful and question your entire parenting philosophy, but in that instant, it feels like sweet relief. Guess what? It happens. And if you’re telling me you’ve never lost your cool, I’m calling BS. We’re not robots; we’re human. Parenting is hard. So, let’s just give ourselves a little grace and acknowledge that sometimes we’re going to lose it.

4. The Constant Struggle of Being “Everything” to Everyone

We’ve all heard it: “You can’t pour from an empty cup!” But let me tell you, there’s not enough coffee in the world to fill my cup when I’m constantly pouring it into everyone else’s. Being a mum means being everything to everyone—personal chef, therapist, teacher, chauffeur and probably the person who’ll fix the Wi-Fi. But hey, no big deal, right? Who needs a break when there’s another meal to make or another meltdown to calm down? But seriously, we all need a moment to just be—whether that’s five minutes to breathe or an actual spa day (don’t hold your breath).

5.The Hidden Financial Pressure of Parenthood

Everyone tells you that kids are expensive, but they don’t mention just how mind-bogglingly expensive they are. Between the nappies, the clothes they grow out of in a second, the food and the toys they’ll ignore after five minutes, it’s enough to make you want to cry into your empty purse. And God forbid you even think about buying something for yourself. While my children sleep in pure cotton and silk pjs every night, I still wear the ones I’m pretty sure I gave birth in. Because, obviously, the kids need new stuff more than I do. Always.

6.The Guilt of ‘Not Having It All Together’

You know the mums you see online, the ones who look like they’ve stepped off the pages of Vogue and somehow still manage to make organic, Pinterest-worthy lunches while their kids sit quietly in the background, smiling like perfect angels? Yeah, that’s not most of us. The truth is, we’re all just winging it—and often, it feels like we’re doing a terrible job. Your house is a mess, your to-do list is longer than the Great Wall of China and you’re questioning whether it’s normal to eat half a packet of biscuits in one sitting while hiding in the loo. But here’s the thing: it’s okay. You’re allowed to not have it all together. In fact, most of us don’t. And that’s what makes you real.

Conclusion:

There’s no manual for motherhood, and there’s no “one-size-fits-all” answer. So let’s stop pretending that it’s all perfect moments and picture-perfect smiles. Sometimes it’s messy, sometimes it’s chaotic and sometimes it’s downright frustrating. But through it all, remember: you’re doing the best you can. And that, my Darling, is enough. So, let’s embrace the taboos, laugh at the absurdity of it all and give each other a break—because honestly, we all need it.

And hey, if anyone has a spare bladder control technique, feel free to share.