Relationships: chapter 8, The Double Standards of Mum vs Dad

Parenthood doesn’t happen in a vacuum. The moment you become a mum, every relationship you’ve ever had gets thrown into a metaphorical washing machine – set to spin cycle. Spouses, friends, colleagues: nothing escapes the shakeup. Balancing these relationships while keeping tiny humans alive? It’s an act worthy of a circus tent.

The stakes feel high because these relationships often serve as our lifelines. Your spouse, once your partner in crime, now feels like that co-worker who you don’t really like. Friendships are now a blend of heartfelt venting sessions and mutual apologies for unanswered texts. And let’s not forget the high-wire balancing act of deciding between work and staying at home, as if one choice will irrevocably define your worth as a mother and person.

Relationships are messy, hilarious and surprisingly resilient, even in the chaos of parenthood. So grab your metaphorical popcorn, because it’s show time.

Chapter 8: The Double Standards of Mum vs Dad

Ever notice that when a dad takes his kids out, it’s like he’s out for a stroll with the royal family? Strangers rush over to coo, “Wow, what a great dad!” He gets offered help with the pram, a pat on the back, maybe even a round of applause. He could be wiping a toddler’s nose on his sleeve while holding a baby and people are like, “Look at him, such a hands-on dad!” It’s like giving someone an award for remembering to breathe.

But is a mum takes her kids out? Crickets. No one’s rushing to offer her praise. Why? Because society expects her to have it together at all times. “She’s just a mum – this is what she does.” She’s not ‘hands-on’, she’s hands everywhere. People only notice if something goes wrong, like if the kids start throwing a tantrum in the cereal aisle. Then of course it’s, “Can’t she control her child?” Or “Where’s dad?” (probably getting a coffee somewhere, you know, because he’s earned it).

All this inevitably leads to the ultimate test of co-parenting: passive aggressive texting. There’s nothing like exchanging messages about whose fault it is that your baby only napped for 20 minutes, all while pretending everything’s fine because you’re in public. Pro tip: add emojis for flair. Nothing says, “I’m furious but trying to be chill,” like a well-placed winky face.

The secret to surviving the tightrope? Communication and humour. If you can laugh together while scrubbing vomit off the car seat at 2 a.m., you’re doing something right. And when humour doesn’t cut it? Here’s the truth bomb: the real parenting dream team kicks in when both players start treating the family routine like the championship round of the Parenting Olympics. Because until both of you get a shot at MVP, you’re just the frazzled coach shouting, “USE THE WET WIPES!” from the side lines.